Let me go ahead and start without thinking through (that's the first sign that you were on a vacation and are now in some form of withdrawal!)
'Do you remember your previous password? No
Can you give me the phone number you registered with us for password recovery? I don't remember.
Can you tell me your work ID? I don't know it.
Can you give me your Secret answer for data recovery? I don't remember.
Can you give us your joining date? 3..no, four, no 3..definitely 4 years ago... it was summer - so maybe June or August?
Ma'am, do you really work with us?'
2. It's like someone rearranged your entire house in your absence. ENTIRE.HOUSE. Seriously. Including the light switches and all.
3. Someone died in your refrigerator.
4. Your brain is melted cheese and you just want to eat it.
5. You sob like a baby when you have to wake up and it's Monday morning and it's your first day back to work.
6. You are back from a 3 week vacation and you look like you returned from a ship wreck.
7. There is nothing to eat at home. How is that possible? Maybe that person who died in your refrigerator ate himself to death. And you and your husband are avoiding looking at each other because the topic of who needs to go grocery shopping will come up.
8. You can't unpack because you do not know where anything goes in the house. Remember? Someone rearranged the entire house.
9. You discover that life didn't stop when you were away.
You get told, 'Jen, this document is due on Wednesday - that is tomorrow.'
Me: 'But I was on vacation and I just got back'.
Evil man: 'Exactly. Due tomorrow'.
Bills: 'You are late with your payment'
Me: 'But I was on vacation. I wasn't here on that date.'
Bills: 'In that case, please include the late payment fee and interest.'
Cable: 'Reduced service. Bill unpaid'.
Me: 'But I was on vacation.'
Cable: 'So many of your shows haven't been DVRed. You still owe me.'
10. You can't buy anything until an appropriate amount of guilt period has subsided. You did overspend on that vacation, right?
11. Kids do not understand jetlag. Infact they do not understand anything after a vacation.
12. You have no clue what rules have changed in your absence. Do they still bathe everyday?
13. Someone also died in one suitcase where all the dirty laundry is neatly packed.
14. No one has been excitedly waiting for you to return. So when you call couple of your friends up, they run straight into their day to day issues and you have to remind them that you were away for 3 weeks, remember? And when they ask you how your vacation was, you say, 'FINE'.
15. When did you get so fat? Did someone rearrange the internals on this weighing scale?
Oh, wait... this was supposed to be 15 great things? This is what a vacation does to you! Well.. there are these pics of great times.